I felt the tug of the Snow Moon to rise and complete this story that I had started on Saturday. It’s 4:44 am, Sunday morning. As Samuel said to the Divine “Here I am, Lord.”
I have not written in about 2 years. Not sure why I stopped. This morning, I woke with the sense I wanted to write. I will start with what has been happening the past few weeks in our household.
PETS
It was time for Freddy’s annual check-up. We had been notified that Dr. Swenson had retired and his practice had been sold to other veterinarians. No problem there as I had not thought much of Dr. Swenson’s competence. A nice enough man, but if there was a problem, forget it, I could not count on him. Years ago, he was the Vet for my dog Casey, and he could not figure out what was the matter with her. She was losing weight, shedding handfuls of hair, lethargic, and had skin issues. He recommended I put her down. By happenstance, I spoke about Casey to the house physician at Canyon Ranch in the Berkshires where I was working; I was aware she was a dog lover, too. She suggested that Casey be tested for thyroid disease. And, sure enough, Casey was hypothyroid. A simple medication-Synthroid–was all she needed to live fully, happily another 3 years.
Dr. Cyran was pleasant, engaging and she gave Freddy a thorough examination. She said his teeth were in dire need of cleaning. She explained dental surgery was needed and he would need to be under anesthesia and likely loose teeth in the process. I had previously raised this with Dr. Swenson who had disapproved. We agreed to schedule Freddy for dental surgery.
As in past winters, Freddy’s eyes were irritated by the wind, sand, and salt from the roads and Dr. Cyran prescribed a new eye ointment. Ca-ching.
She also recommended a new vaccine for Leptospirosis. Ca-ching.
During the exam, we raised a new, disconcerting behavior–Freddy was jumping out of bed numerous times during the night, starting around 1 a.m., for no apparent reason. She was just as baffled as us about this new pattern. After taking in all the info and her observations of him, she suggested testing for and ruling out Cushing’s Disease as he had gained a few pounds. Ca-ching.
We were upset, just thinking that there could be something the matter with our lil doodler. She ordered a urine test and asked us to bring back a sample. No problem. The next day we dropped off a sample. Two days later, she called back and asked what time we took the sample–“1:45 p.m.” She said she needed a new sample from his first pee in the morning. Ca-ching.
Oh boy! The usual routine is that Freddy gets up a 5 a.m. and Bruce takes him out for a walk, and he does his duty. In this instance, I would need to accompany Bruce to catch the sample. At 5 a.m. it is dark and cold; Bruce has gloves on, a flashlight in one hand and the leash in his other hand, his eyeglasses fog up. The next day, we are all up around 5 a.m., Bruce and I are bundled up, and I have the plastic cup in hand, ready to catch the precious sample.
Well, Freddy is no ordinary dog. When he goes out to do his duty, he doesn’t lift his leg and pee in any old place. In fact, he squats first and raises his leg, ever so slightly. He walks around with keen concentration, checks the topography thoroughly, sniffs exhaustively…and repeats 4-5 times, in ever-enlarging circles before finding the perfect spot to empty his bladder. In the meantime, remember, it is early morning, and it is dark. As we are roaming our neighborhood, our neighbors’ security lights are flashing on brightly in each driveway we pass. Finally…He stops. He squats. He pees. I shove the cup under his little penis and catch the sample. He kicks it off and I spill half the sample. Luckily, it was enough to perform the test. We later learned; he does not have Cushing’s disease. Thank you God.
Back to the problem of him waking repeatedly throughout the night. The Vet prescribed a sedative to help him relax and we put it in his late afternoon meal. Ca-ching. We question whether it is having any substantial effect as he is still waking and jumping out of bed, jumping back in bed, just not as much. Sometimes. We are exhausted.
In the meantime, Freddy was scheduled for an appointment with a new Groomer. Let me give you some background. Freddy is a mini labradoodle, about 24 pounds, 11 years old. Freddy has been to about 15 different groomers. We can’t seem to find the right one–he comes out looking like a poodle, rather than a labradoodle. When we asked our new Vet for recommendations, she gave us a list of 12 groomers. We had already been to 8 of them who proved to be unsatisfactory; 2 of the groomers I had read negative reports about; leaving 2 unknowns. Of the 2, one worked at the Dakin Humane Society Center. I read about her and thought she must be good to be taking care of dogs who come in who have been abandoned and are in dire need of a bath and grooming. She also donates one half of her fee to Dakin, and I was impressed by her generosity and commitment to animals. Here is a picture of Carol from the Dakin website. She has a beautiful smile, and you can tell she is a dog person.
We book an appointment; show up; and she says I have the wrong time. “I am sorry” I say, and we rebook for another day and time. Bruce looks at me as if to say, “Did you screw up?” Later, she telephones to apologize; it was her error. No problem, we all make scheduling mistakes. A big snowstorm is predicted for the day of our new appointment–we have to cancel and reschedule. Finally. The big day comes. We bring him to the Center. He will be ready to be picked up in 2 hours, Carol tells us. We like the fact that Carol works on only one dog at a time and Freddy does not need to be disturbed by other dogs, and he doesn’t need to be away from us for very long. He looks great! She did a terrific job, especially around his eyes and mouth and not too short on his body. We are very pleased! We will be back in 8 weeks.
Next day. To the dental surgery facility at 8 a.m. We feel a bit anxious, yet we have faith that this is the right thing to do for Freddy. He had not displayed any pain nor discomfort in his little mouth, and we wanted to avoid any problems in the future, such as emergency extractions, odor, gum disease, or infections. So, after 12 pages of legalese later, we sign off and leave Freddy in the capable hands of the Feeding Hills Veterinary Services staff. BIG CA-CHING. It felt weird not to have Freddy with us during the day and we were nervously excited to pick him up at 4 p.m. He came through beautifully. Thank you, God.
Four days later, we are pleased to say Freddy is back to his normal whack-a-doodle self, less 8 teeth. They were bad and had to come out. He is still the cutest dog in the world. Hey, he made the cover of Rolling Bone, and that’s no small feat.
My diagnosis of Freddy. He has fully and completely channeled Nadine, our cat, who passed about 6 years ago. Nadine used to sleep soundly in our bed, at our feet. Then, as she aged, she began jumping on the headboard and nosediving on our heads, hoping that we would wake and feed her. She was half right. We ended up closing her out of our bedroom. She then took to throwing herself at the closed door and yowling wickedly. She also would go under the ottoman in the sitting room and wildly scratch the rug with her clawless paws. Freddy now goes under the ottoman, scratches the rug, comes out from under, and looks around as if he believes he has conjured up Nadine. Nadine, had lost many of her teeth naturally. But she had an extra-large canine in her lower mouth that would stick out over her upper lip. Freddy was born with an underbite. Now that he has had 4 lower teeth removed, his 2 lower canines stick out all the more visibly. At the time when Nadine started acting weirdly, I contacted an animal whisperer. (I see you raising your eyebrows and rolling your eyes. And, yes, I did pay for this consultation.) At the conclusion of the call, the intuitive said Nadine has “Old Lady/Cat Syndrome”. I don’t need to contact an animal whisperer again–Freddy has “Old Man/Dog Syndrome”.
We love our lil doodler, as we did Nadine, and our prayer is that God helps us to be the best caretakers of him.
CARS
Onto the story about our car, a Subaru Outback. I have to say, I am wowed by the advances in technology in the car repair industry and its customer service. Full disclosure: Bruce and I know nothing about cars. We don’t look under the hood because we would not know what we are looking at. We scheduled our 2015 car for its regularly planned maintenance. In addition to the routine things that needed to be repaired or replaced, there were some pricey glitches. For example, a rodents’ nest was found near the engine. Wires were chewed on and totally disconnected. And other things added up-brakes, battery, etc. Ca-Ching, Ca-ching.
Here’s an audio video that was given to us, showing what the service rep found and the recommended action.
Very sophisticated. When I picked up the car, the person who checked me out said “Wow you have a practically new car!” We think we will keep the car for another year (it will be 10 years old next year) and get back, so to speak, the couple thousand dollars we just put into it. We will likely stay in the Subaru family of cars, but probably not an Outback as we don’t need that level of power. We originally traded in our VW Jetta for the Outback because we needed it to haul the Teardrop Trailer, which we never did haul…anywhere; the Teardrop Trailer never moved off the driveway except when we moved it to the front yard so the driveway could be enlarged to accommodate it. Don’t even get me started on that!
The loaner the dealership gave us to use while our car was in the shop was a Subaru CrossTrek. We liked it; maybe something a little classier (like a Legacy), less sporty for our next car. It was fun browsing through the brochures the rep was only too happy to give me. In the meantime, we have time to research.
SPIRITUAL PRACTICES, YOGA and NAIKAN
If you know me, you know I have a deep spiritual practice that includes prayer, reading the Bible and other inspirational books, mostly from Unity or Science of Mind, passage meditation, andyoga. I follow authors who write from the metaphysical world view, such as Charles and Myrtle Filmore, Florence Scovel Shinn, Eric Butterworth, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Emmet Fox, Ernest Holmes, Elizabeth Sand Turner, H. Emily Cady, Wayne Muller, Louise Hay, Eknath Easwaran, and many others. Although I have used journalling over the years, it has not been consistent.
Recently, I discovered Naikan (pronounced Ni-kon, like the camera). It is a Japanese method of self-reflection that leads to a deeper sense of our interdependence with all others and our connectedness to the Universe. The practice includes writing each evening, answering three questions:
*What have I received today from someone or from the Universe?
*What have I given to someone or to the Universe? and
*What troubles, difficulties, or problems have I caused or created for someone or the Universe?
I have found this very useful and practical. The practice can go deeper by reflecting on periods of our lives and or focusing on specific people in our lives. I have not done this exercise yet. The guidebook I am using is “Naikan: Gratitude, Grace, and the Japanese Art of Self-Reflection” by Gregg Krech. I have also purchased “Even in Summer the Ice Doesn’t Melt” by David K Reynolds, Ph.D., an anthropologist who brought this Japanese method to the US.
After a 2-year hiatus, I am back to the yoga studio and am happy that I have resumed my practice. We recite this prayer before we begin each session:
“Lead me from the unreal to the real, Lead me from darkness to light, Lead me from time-bound consciousness to timeless state of being.”
That is all for now, friends.
Namaste
P.S. Please know that I write to share with others, not necessarily to influence others. I am interested to learn what is happening with you, in your life. Please feel free to contact me here or at soapsusan@aol.com.
P.P.S. All photos are by Bruce Barone, except noted. Visit his website at www.brucebarone.com
Let me say from the beginning that this has no rhyme nor reason, what I am writing and sharing. I only feel the need to express and to write, for several weeks now. But everything I think and feel seems so trite, so banal in the midst of so much suffering. So, please, bear with me, as I try to put down in words some of what I am thinking and feeling and doing and not doing. It is an exercise in maintaining my sanity, my equanimity, a quality a fellow student once said I possessed. Funny, because right now, I feel so out of balance. And I am not speaking only about my psyche, but my body is out of balance: I have no center of gravity any longer. I have gained more weight and it feels like if I fell down I would just tumble away, like Humpty Dumpty.
Let me start with my hair because that was one of my first worries when we entered this shelter in place phase. Yup, I worried about my hair and my nails, and my complexion. Normally, for the past several decades, I get a manicure every 2 weeks, a pedicure every 4 weeks, and a facial every month. I also see a dermatologist every 3-4 months to get whatever may be growing on my face removed. I get my hair colored every 3 weeks and trimmed every 6 weeks. In between, my hair stylist puts highlights in my hair.
I also see my doctors regularly–gyno every 6 months, psych every 3 months [same person, but I won’t go into that here], PCP every 12 months, ophthalmologist as needed for dry eye, dermatologist as needed for rosacea. Rheumatologist as needed for my arthritis. And then, there are all those visits to the pharmacy to get the meds these docs prescribe to treat my various and sundry maladies.
In February, I saw my PCP for my annual and she gave me a referral to The Arthritis and Pain Center. I made an appointment, but then cancelled it because I did not want to risk going out, even though the Center was still open. As of now, I still have not rescheduled and I hope there is no time limit to the referral.
I saw my regular eye doctor in February for inflammation caused by dry eye, once as an emergency and then 2 weeks later for a followup. She then referred me to a specialist who is very difficult to book with. When the appointment came up in March, I cancelled and rescheduled for a week later. A week later that doctor cancelled my appointment. What are people doing who have really serious conditions? Everything seems to be on hold.
I am coloring my own hair, as many women are doing. Mixed results–the gray roots are covered, but the color is all wrong and my highlights are gone. I don’t even care. My hair stylist will fix it once I am back to my regular appointments. Bruce needs a haircut and he seems to be enjoying the shaggy look. He needs a shave, too.
I give myself a clay mask every week and I use a scrub daily to exfoliate. Some days my complexion looks good, some days it doesn’t. What am I going to do? My nails are a mess. I have cuticles that are out of control. I try to trim them only to end up with cuts and nicks and then I pick at them. I am going to give myself a paraffin treatment later on. Nothing I do at home beats what a professional can do for me in half the time. It is money well spent when I can leave a salon, feeling confident, knowing that I have been taken care of and look the best I can. When will the shops and salons reopen?
The last time we were normal was the week of March 7th. We celebrated Bruce’s birthday at his daughter’s home with our son-in-law, Mike and our grandchildren, Emily and Matthew.
That week was the last time we volunteered with the 4th graders at Coburn Elementary School.
We went to the 2nd session of Bible Study during Lent at Grace Lutheran Church with a small group of folks, led by Pastor John Marquis, who had married us in our living room in December 2014. After that week, Bridges Together volunteer program was cancelled as were the Lenten services.
I found a beautiful Lane cedar chest for sale on Facebook Marketplace. A woman, right here in town was selling it and Bruce was not opposed to us going to her home to pick it up. As we were leaving her, after a pleasant conversation, she extended her hand to shake and we did. And then we smiled, guiltily, and said, we shouldn’t have done that. We all acknowledged it was a weird time.
I visited a neighbor that week and bought some pretty wine glasses from her. Her mother had passed a couple weeks before [not from covid 19], but there were no services.
A neighbor was having some tree work done in her yard. We had been contemplating taking a tree done in our yard and thought, why not now? So, we had that done and taken care of.
I took Prashna to her doctor as she was not feeling well. She had a fever, but not covid 19. School was cancelled since then and I have not seen her. I chat with her through messenger on Facebook. I miss her and I worry about her and her brother. I fear their brains are turning to mush. In their household, there are no books, or toys or games, or white boards to write on elaborate schedules to follow. What I see on television is white middle and upper class families homeschooling their children using all sorts of internet resources to educate and entertain their children. Not so with poor families. Another divide that has been made painfully clear during this pandemic.
I read a lot, all the time, and, fortunately, this time of the pandemic is no different. Reading has always been my saving grace. I have been reading biographies of our American president in chronological order, since January 2019. I have just finished books about Zachary Taylor, James Polk, and Franklin Pierce. I mistakenly skipped Millard Filmore so I will start reading his biography now. I read “The Practice of the Presence of God” by Brother Lawrence as I like reading spiritual books. And right now, I am also re-reading “The Call of the Wild” by Jack London. It is terrific story-telling from the perspective of the dog, Buck.
Bruce and I passed time working on a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle. Freddy is always with us.
A robin couple has made a nest in the wreath at our front door. We have been watching the male and female birds and the eggs she has lain. She laid one more since this picture was taken. The birds take no care for the pandemic surrounding us.
I have continued to shop on line, which is not unusual for me. My thinking is that it is a good thing for the economy. Doing my small part. I bought the aforementioned hair color, from 2 different companies,[MadisonReed and esalon] as a hedge if one was not able to fulfill the order. I don’t really need anything right now, so I have bought small things like lip stick and lip gloss and facial scrub from Nordstrom. I bought toys and candy for the grand kids and a gift for Danielle’s newly renovated kitchen. I ordered on line lawn care stuff from The Home Depot and picked it up at the store so that our local store got the business. I ordered jams and jellies and chocolate sauce and gourmet mustard from Stonewall Kitchen just for fun. A new 8 inch, non stick frying pan, with a cover, for Bruce from Zwillings because even though he already has 9 frying pans, he said he needed another.
I have looked to buy a thermometer, to no avail. Cannot find yeast for baking. We have enough toilet paper. Bruce has ordered wine on line as well as purchased at Bertelli’s, the local package store. It now has plexiglass installed between the customer and the cashier and customers bag their own bottles. I am not shopping at Costco during this time in order to reduce exposure. Bruce is doing all of our shopping at Big Y. I miss our favorite products from Costco and the bargains, but I don’t think it is worth it to go to another shop.
Bruce is taking all the risks for us. He grocery shops, goes to the pharmacy, the post office, the bank, the package store. He wears a mask wherever he goes. Betsy, his former wife, made us masks with filters. She is a fabulous sewer and a generous person.
Bruce does all the cooking in our household and he is a terrific chef. In these past 2 months, we have ordered out 2 times and picked up our orders from our favorite Italian restaurants in town, BNapoli and Sorrentos. We miss going out to eat to our favorite restaurants and look forward to the day when we can enjoy a drink and a meal at a nice restaurant.
We have been eating well, as we always have, thanks to Bruce.
I have been doing more baking than usual, mostly to pass the time and to have indulgent sweets to nosh on. Date nut cake, chocolate cake, peanut butter coconut bars, chocolate pudding.
Like I said, I have gained weight. Basic science and math: eating more + moving less = weight gain.
What can I say? Despite what all the life coaches are saying on tv, I don’t have the motivation to make good choices right now. If a brain scan was done right now, all that would be seen is that white snow that you used to see on tv when they stopped broad-casting.
I purposely have not talked about the people suffering from the covid 19 disease, the people caring for them and the buildings they are in; the people who clean and serve and check us out; the folks who protect, put fires out, put us in ambulances; the people who drive trucks and get stuff from here to there and back; the people who pick up our garbage; who research and investigate and bring us the news, the folks who make us laugh; the people trying to find a cure; home sewers who are making masks. The people trying to find homes for dogs and cats who have lost their owners. All of the angels among us. Others have told their stories better than I ever could.
I experience a range of feelings throughout the day. Faith and hope in the morning; boredom throughout the day; inspiration and awe when hearing what people have done and are enduring in the face of tremendous challenges; confusion, worry, despair during the evening when all my inner resources have been spent.
I do not use all my time wisely. I could be doing yoga or meditating or learning to knit. So far, not yet. I have kept my habit of prayer; that is one constant that has remained. And so I will end with this prayer:
Thanksgiving preparations for Susan and me begin a few weeks before the holiday.
We put our tree up early so our grandchildren can see it on Thanksgiving as we don’t see them on Christmas.
Here I am doing some menu-planning for the week.
And here is Sock Monkey guarding the grandchildren’s presents.
The grandchildren come over for breakfast, along with our daughter and son-and-law. We give them their Christmas gifts—clothes that they can wear on Christmas day. I have to give credit where credit is due; Susan buys all the Christmas gifts. She often consults with me about style and size.
Here’s Matthew opening his gift.
We watch the Macy’s Parade and the Westminster Dog show before they leave for dinner at Mike’s moms and we head to Connecticut for dinner at our niece and nephews home. This is the real tradition—all of this along with breakfast. Here’s the menu:
Here’s Emily wearing her new winter jacket; I love this photo.
Before I forget, I want to tell you about the gratitude pumpkin. That’s right—a gratitude pumpkin. Not a real pumpkin but a pumpkin made of 8 strips of orange paper. On each strip you write one thing you are grateful for. Susan and I made them in our 4th grade Bridges Together class. Then stable it together to form a pumpkin. Voila!
My writing (hand-writing that is) is not so good. This is what I wrote:
I am thankful for our grandchildren
I am thankful for my wife, Susan
I am thankful for my brother and sisters
I am thankful for my friends
I am thankful for my son & daughter
I am thankful for our dog, Freddy
I am thankful for our beautiful home
I am thankful for my health (Not so sure if I am thankful for the kidney stones. After one operation I am drinking so much water I feel like the main character in John Irving’s “The Water-Method Man.” Who knows what 2020 has in store for me.)
So what about the quiche?
I hardly ever make a crust for my quiche. Why bother? And crust-less means less calories for those like me who are working to lose weight! A goal for 2020 for sure.
You can add almost anything to this quiche: onion, bacon, sausage, spinach, peppers. In this quiche I added leek, mushrooms, and tomato.
Preheat oven to 375F
Ingredients
6 eggs, room temperature
1 cup half & half and 1 cup heavy cream, room temperature
2 cups diced butternut squash, oven-roasted at 400 for 30 minutes
2 cups grated Gruyere cheese
2 cups chopped baby spinach
pinch of nutmeg or allspice
salt and pepper to taste
Directions
Grease a 10″ pie plate.
Roast butternut squash for about 30 minutes and then set aside to cool.
Crack eggs into a large mixing bowl. Add half & half and heavy cream, salt and pepper, and nutmeg, and beat thoroughly. Then add your vegetables and cheese. Mix well. Pour the mixture into your prepared pie plate. I added a few sliced mushroom to half of this because our grandson loves mushrooms. Who knew!
Bake on the middle rack of the oven for 35–45 minutes. Maybe 50 minutes if your prefer a crusty top!
Allow to cool for a few minutes before slicing and serving.
One last tradition. We always listen to Alice’s Restaurant on Thanksgiving Eve or Day!
So, what are some of our family traditions? Name at least three and I will send you a Christmas Card!
I believe I am making the world a better place with beautiful photography.If you are looking for beautiful portrait, nature, or documentary photography, or someone you know is looking for photography that helps to create a more artful and beautiful life, please contact me.
“I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers,” wrote L.M. Montgomery in Anne of Green Gables.
Me, too!!!
Picture-perfect evidence of God’s majesty surround us.
Magnificent autumn leaves invite us to see the beauty that envelops us.
At Mittineague Park, the park down the street from where we live.
Or at Blair Lake on the outskirts of the Berkshires.
Of course, there are all those pumpkins!
Sometimes, we receive a surprise snow storm in October.
October light helps me create beautiful portraits, too.
Here are a few dinner and deserts I have made in October (Lentil Soup, Beef Stew, Butternut Squash with Scallops, North African Meatballs, Apple Pie and Cherry Cobler):
Yes, my friends, I made pasta and pizza, too. And fish–like these Panko Coconut Crusted Scallops:
October brings cooler nights; sweater and sweatshirt weather (Pictured here yours truly and my beloved wife, Susan.).
Our dog, Freddy, a mini-labradoodle loves playing amongst the autumn leaves.
A few final thoughts. One of my favorite poems, “Kicking Leaves,” by Donald Hall begins:
Kicking the leaves, October, as we walk home together
from the game, in Ann Arbor,
on a day the color of soot, rain in the air;
I kick at the leaves of maples,
reds of seventy different shades, yellows
like old paper; and poplar leaves, fragile and pale;
One last thought. Music. A favorite album/CD of ours is “When October Goes, Autumn Love Songs.” Music by Christine Lavin, John Gorka, Patty Larkin, Cheryl Wheeler and others. You can get your copy here.
I believe I am making the world a better place with beautiful photography.If you are looking for beautiful portrait, nature, or documentary photography, or someone you know is looking for photography that helps to create a more artful and beautiful life, please contact me at bruce@brucebarone.com.
Today, Sunday, September 22, is the last day of summer. I am not sorry to say goodbye to summer. Oh, there were many great times. The time Susan, Freddy and I went to Art in the Orchard.
The field at Black Rabbit Farm. We let Freddy off leash and he had such a blast running around as we enjoyed out beer.
The garden looked beautiful throughout the summer, especially the zinnias, but my tomato and eggplant harvest was a great disappointment.
Early in the summer the clematis plants on the arbor brought great beauty and joy to us.
One of my favorite butterfly photos (It is so hard to choose a favorite! I photographed them every day—even today!) is this one from July:
A highlight, for me, was practicing yoga every morning near the arbor.
Of course, Freddy brings us great joy every day. He’s such a good boy!
One day when I was playing catch with Freddy with a small black ball and it rolled through the garden. It took me a long time to find it and as I was looking for it I found a butterfly I had never seen before, a Black and Blue Swallowtail, I believe. I wondered, for a brief second or two, if the black ball had magically turned into a butterfly.
Susan made many delicious deserts, like this Berry Cake:
Some of my food favorites from the summer include Cucumber Gazpacho, Tomato Soup, Grilled Scallops with White Beans and Spinach, and Shrimp and Rice:
I was thankful to be asked to photograph a mom, Bana, and her baby, Rosey, every month for 12 months.
Here is a photo from July that I just love because it illustrates the beauty Susan and I have created in our home. Plus, it shows two of my favorite photos.
Probably the highlight of our summer was winning the Western Mass News / Big Y Backyard BBQ. Susan had been trying and trying and trying to win and one Friday night we got a phone call from a reporter and he said “Susan, you just won the Backyard BBQ.” We invited 20+ plus people over—neighbors and friends. We had such a wonderful time and the people from Big Y and Western Mass News were awesome! Big Y supplied the food and did the cooking!
And now I give thanks for the times Susan and I spend in our backyard enjoying a glass of wine or cocktail before dinner.
There were a number of family get-togethers, too. A visit from our son and his girlfriend, a BBQ at our niece and nephews house (I always enjoy the opportunity to photograph their daughter, Lauren), and our grandson’s 4th birthday party!
I would be remiss not to say something about Susan. My wife. My best friend. My guide. My inspiration. Every day I give thanks that she is in my life. She is an amazing person.
I believe I am making the world a better place with beautiful photography.If you are looking for beautiful portrait, nature, or documentary photography, or someone you know is looking for photography that helps to create a more artful and beautiful life, please contact me. http://www.brucebarone.com
My 2019 new year goal was to read a biography of each of our U. S. Presidents, in chronological order. It’s July and I am up to our fifth President, James Monroe. I was sidetracked along the way. So, let me share with you what I have been reading.
I am an avid reader. Always have been. Reading books has saved my life. But I digress…more about that in another post.
Bruce is a prolific reader and we love to talk with each other about what we read.
We get the Sunday New York Times. Bruce reads it. I only read the Magazine and do the crossword puzzle. It takes me until Thursday and I complete about 95%, with Bruce’s help. Freddy helps, too.
We buy The West Springfield Record, our local newspaper at the corner store, every Thursday. This week’s edition has a long article about one of my favorite authors, Gladys Taber, a sort of native daughter of West Springfield. She wrote more than 50 books and wrote popular magazine columns in The Ladies Home Journal and Family Circle. I have read about 20 of her books. They are memoirs or journals of her life, raising her daughter, working as a journalist, creating a rural life in Connecticut, away from NYC, with her friend and her children. She wrote in a lyrical way about nature, love, loss, housekeeping, pets, children. She died in 1980 and her books are out of print. Search for her books in libraries as I did. Check out Gladys Taber; you will not be disappointed.
We get lots of magazines. The New Yorker is my all-time favorite. My nephew and his wife give us a subscription for a Christmas gift every year. Bloomberg Business is an easy way to keep up about what’s going on in the markets and the economies around the world. Yoga is inspiring. Catholic TV magazine. We are not Catholic, but we watch the mass each evening and the magazine let’s us know which priest is serving~we have our favorites. This Old House gives practical advise. Simple has good recipes as does Shape. Better Homes and Gardens and Country Living for recipes and decorating. Birds and Bloom, a gift from Bruce’s sister, filled with great photos and tips for attracting birds to your backyard.
We also get Poetry, a monthly. I don’t read poetry; I don’t get it. Bruce does. And, we get The Daily Word. It is a small booklet filled with biblical passages and an uplifting message for each day of the month.
We go to the town library about once a week and take out a cookbook or two for inspiration, even though we have lots of cookbooks.
In January, I started my presidential journey with HisExcellency: George Washington by Joseph J. Ellis.
Next up, our second President, John Adams by John Ferling was a great read and especially interesting as he was from Massachusetts. His relationship with Thomas Jefferson was played out in this book as well as in American Sphinx about Jefferson by Joseph J. Ellis. Jefferson was full of contradictions; an absolutely fascinating read. Our fourth President, James Madison, by Richard Brookhiser, was an easy read.
In these books, I learned about the forming of our nation, the particularly genius minds of the time, how intractable differences were worked out [relationship with Britain, states rights versus federal government, central bank] or ignored [slavery], diplomacy, the conditions which led to the Revolutionary War. I learned about the formation of our two party system and the beginnings of the Democrat and Republican parties. Madison was quite a political animal, I mean, strategist. He assembled one of our nation’s first political parties, the Republicans, who became today’s Democrats.
I am up to our fifth President, James Monroe, another Southerner. He was not a very interesting person nor President from what the historians say and there are only a couple books written about him and they are not well written, lacking and biased. I have chosen to read James Monroe: The American Presidents Series: The 5th President, 1817-1825 by Arthur M. Schlesinger, Jr. and Gary Hart. It was written in 2005. Monroe is known primarily for two things: being the last of the southern, Virginian dynasty, following Washington, Jefferson and Madison and for issuing the Monroe Doctrine. The Monroe Doctrine, written by John Quincy Adams, is a statement of principles that the western hemisphere was to be considered closed to European intervention. I look forward to reading it and getting back on track. I estimate I will be reading the American presidents for the next few years.
This is how I got off track in the Spring. It is my habit to read a spiritual book during Lenten season. In the past I have read Keep a True Lent by Charles Fillmore and The Week That Changed the World by Ernest C. Wilson. I highly recommend these books for reading any time of the year. This year I choose, regrettably, The Real Christ by Bernadette Roberts. It is 620 pages and it took me forever to read. I hated it, every single page, but I kept on reading it til the bitter end, because that’s the kind of person I am. This is what the synopsis says: “The Real Christ is simply the E=MC of theology, unfolding the deepest mysteries of the Trinity with profound clarity. This is a must read book for anyone who has struggled with remaining a Christian or grown frustrated with the banality of what seems to be the “Jesus industry” of corporate Christianity.”
WTF??? Had I read that, I never would have started this book. I wasted my time on this awful book. What more can I say? Except that I still felt the need to fulfill my yearly Lenten habit of reading a spiritual book. So, I read The Forty-Day Fast: A Spiritual Journey to Eliminate Toxic Words From Your Life by Tim Cameron. This book was a mere 258 pages. The premise of the book is that when you eliminate negative words [judgment, sarcasm, negativity, complaining and gossip] from your mouth, your heart will change and ‘ye shall be transformed’. Definitely sound advise…I may need a refresher.
I saw an interview on PBS with a writer, Glory Edim, about the importance of telling stories about women of color. She edited Well-Read Black Girl: Finding Our Stories, Discovering Ourselves. Of course, I had to read it.This is a beautifully curated collection of stories by and about women of color.
Next, PBS aired “Les Miserables”. I watched it and recalled fond memories of when my 6th grade teacher, Mrs. Smith, read this book, by Victor Hugo, to us each Friday afternoon. So, I decided to read it. All 1070 pages of it. Truly considered one of the greatest novels of the world, I enjoyed the universal moral theme of redemption, but did not enjoy slogging through French history and the French Revolution[s]. You can see how my mind gets caught going down these mazes….
Next up…While trying to find a good book about James Monroe to read, [remember my original goal] I started The Voyage of the Beagle by Charles Darwin. It’s a Harvard Classic, don’t you know? Here’s a description:
When HMS Beagle sailed out of Devonport on 27 December 1831, Charles Darwin was twenty-two and setting off on the voyage of a lifetime. His journal, here reprinted in a shortened form, shows a naturalist making patient observations concerning geology, natural history, people, places and events. Volcanoes in the Galapagos, the Gossamer spider of Patagonia and the Australasian coral reefs – all are to be found in these extraordinary writings. The insights made here were to set in motion the intellectual currents that led to the most controversial book of the Victorian age: The Origin of Species.
I am still reading it, haven’t finished it, yet. We are now at Tahiti; I trust we will be ending our trip soon.
But in the meantime….We were watching PBS Newshour and heard an interview with Arthur C. Brooks of the American Enterprise Institute talking about his latest book, Love Your Enemies: How Decent People Can Save America from the Culture of Contempt. It sounded so interesting I was compelled to read it. I found this book refreshingly challenging and for me it echoes back to our founding fathers and the way they acted and dealt with conflict. Brooks’ premise is that we should not try to agree more; disagreement and competition are secrets to excellence. He offers suggestions for bridging divides and mending relationships, rather than feeling contempt and demonizing our enemies. I recommend this book to all of us who want to work towards a better civil discourse with our brothers and sisters.
And then, lastly, on Saturday, July 6th, I was at the West Springfield Public Library with my Nepali friends, when I saw an intriguing title: How to Raise Successful People: Simple Lessons for Radical Results by Ester Wojcicki. 336 pages. I am not a parent; I don’t have children. Yet, I am a grandmother [to Bruce’s daughter’s children], I volunteer in the 3rd grade at a local school, and I am a friend to 3 Nepali children. I want to be the best role model I can be. This book is about bringing out the best in people based on the values of trust, respect, independence, collaboration, and kindness [TRICK]. I recommend it as “a must read” for parents, teachers, managers and anyone who wants to have a positive effect on the development of others.
So, there you have it friends. That’s what I have been reading. Tell me what you have been reading.
I have an appointment coming up at renew.calm with Dawn Nooney, the owner and esthetician. I had been seeing another esthetician , but when Dawn’s schedule opened up, I switched. I thought it will be easier to write about my skin care routine than to tell her about it. It would use up my precious treatment time and I would likely leave something out. This litany will also be helpful for my dermatologist who treats me for rosacea, demodex, and alopecia and my ophthalmologist who I see for ocular rosacea [when it spreads to my eyes]. Do I even need to say that I am post-menopausal?
For the most part, I have a nice complexion, so I am told. My rosacea outbreaks take the form of small red dots and small pimples on my face and on my eye lids [ocular]. I have two bald spots on my scalp which have not grown nor spread to other parts of my scalp. My hair has been steadily thinning.
Here are the vitamins and supplements I take daily for a variety of reasons:
I buy my vitamins and supplements and extracts from various online vitamin sites and tend to buy high-end clinical line products.
Prescription medications and OTC recommended by my doctors
For the facial rosacea, I take an antibiotic orally Doxycycline hyclate 100 mg twice a day, as well as apply two antibiotic facial creams: Metronidazole cream, 0.75% and Azelaic Acid Gel 15%, twice a day.
For the ocular rosacea, I use a prescription antibiotic ointment on my eye lids. I also use a prescription spray–Hydrocholoros acid spray. I use OTC OCuSOFT lid scrub. It’s a pre-moistened pad. And, I use OTC Systane eye drops for dry eyes. I buy OTC at the local Rite Aid store.
Here’s my skin care routine.
First thing in the morning, I clean my eye lids with the pre-moistened pad. Then, I massage my face with almond oil which is infused with tea tree oil. Tea tree oil is a very effective antiseptic to use in treating rosacea and ocular rosacea. I take my oral antibiotic with breakfast.
Later, I shower and use tea tree oil soap which I make myself, Soap by Susan. In addition to washing my face with soap, I also use a clinical facial cleanser, such as Perricone MD Nutrtive Cleanser or Obagi Nu-Derm Foaming Gel. I use Foreo, a facial cleansing devise–it is made with silicone and it has a gentle stimulating motion. You can find it here at: foreo
After showering, I applyPhysiodermie Stabilizing Lotion ph Balancing to my face. Then, the two antibiotic creams to my face. I put in the eye drops.
I use tizo2sunscreen before applying my make up. I won’t go into my make up though it is relatively quick and easy. I set my makeup with Mario Badescu Facial spray with Aloe, Herbs, and Rosewater. It is quite divine.
At lunch, I take all my vitamins, supplements and extracts with a tall glass of water and pomegranate juice.
At dinner, I take my second dose of oral antibiotic.
At night, I remove my make up by washing my face with Soap by Susan. It is olive oil based so make up dissolves easily. Then, I apply the second dose of antibiotic creams. And lastly, I apply physiodermie Multi-Revitalizing Oil.
I use lanza Healing Oil Shampoo and Conditioner for my hair which is thinning. I also have two bald spots, cause is unknown as I did not elect to have a biopsy. I did have two rounds of cortisone injections, to no avail. I have just started using Viviscal Pro supplements and will consider their hair care products once I have finished the Lanza products.
I also use minoxidal 5% on my scalp. It is a topical aerosol foam that I massage into my scalp daily after shampooing and conditioning. It is intended for men [the 3% is for women], but my doctor recommended it at 5%. Sadly, I haven’t noticed any hair growth. You can buy this anywhere so shop around for the best price which I found at costco
On a weekly basis, I apply a mask all over my face–physiodermie Soft Face Biopeeling. This product sloughs off dead skin cells and gives a smooth texture.
On a monthly basis, I give myself a clay mask in my oily T-zone~nose and chin. It is 100% natural calcium bentonite clay. The brand I use is Aztec Secret, but I don’t think the brand matters. I mix the clay with 1 teaspoon of apple cider vinegar to make the paste and then apply it to my skin to deep clean my pores.
I get a professional facial at renew once a month for a deep clean and to slough off dead skin cells.
I see a dermatologist a few times a year for the rosacea. I am thinking about getting a chemical peel. It costs about $200.00. The product my dermatologist uses is VI Peel.
Then, when I ponder all the time and money I spend on my skin and hair care and still experience rosacea break outs and thinning hair, I take a valium to calm my nerves.
I hope this is helpful to women who have rosacea. Please feel free to share your experience. Comments and questions are welcome.
Some days it seems that nothing happens, like a Seinfeld show. “It’s a show about nothing.” We give meaning to our days by what we think, how we react. It seems no matter how mundane my day is, I always try to find some meaning or at least some humor in it.
“One way to get the most out of life is to look at it as an adventure.” William Feather
When I am out and about, I come home and tell Bruce what I encountered and he listens with attention and says “That’s amazing!” Of course, it is nice to have someone to listen to my yarns, a good listener such as Bruce Barone. “Susan, how was your day?”
Let me tell you.
On Saturday after a yoga class at Transform at Amy Bourque, I brought Prashna and Prashik, my Nepali friends, to a musical concert at the West Springfield Public Library.
Aine Minogue played the harp and told tales for over an hour. She has an Irish lilt and the gift of gab that the Irish are so famous for. She told a folk legend about the selkies on which the movie, “The Secret of Roan Innish” is based. When I told Bruce about it, he knew of the man, John Sayles, from Hoboken, NJ who directed it. We’ll see if we can watch it On Demand. In the meantime, I ordered the book on which the movie is based, “The Secret of the Ron Mor Skerry” from Abe Books. When I finish it, I will pass it onto Prashna, in the hopes that she will read it. It is actually considered a children’s tale. Despite my prodding and bribing, Prashik who is now in 6th grade and is struggling with reading and writing, has no interest in books nor reading. He took out a video game when we were at the library and told me it was “a movie”, a flat out lie.
I asked if they wanted to get something to eat. I suggested Charlie’s Diner, as they had never been there. Going out to eat is an adventure for them as it is not something that Nepalis do. Prashik ordered soda, scrambled eggs, bacon and home fries. Prashna had a hot chocolate, chicken tenders, and fries and a side of ketchup. Their table manners are somewhat lacking, but we got through, with a little direction. They know nothing about nutrition and healthy eating, but every occasion cannot be a lesson.
Okay, that was more of an adventure for them than for me, but it gave me joy to do something for them. And, I had my favorite western sandwich on toasted rye.
Going to Costco can be an adventure. Bruce always tells me “Be careful.” Once when we went together, I confronted a woman who did not return her carriage, one of me pet peeves. She reacted by screaming at me and Bruce thought she might take out a gun and take me out. Last week, when I was at the Costco Liquor store, a man had planted himself in front of the wine bins, on his mobile phone. I asked him if he were “shopping or talking?” He said “Both” and I kindly pointed out to him he was not doing either well. I am on a spiritual journey and I think everyone would be better off if they, too, practiced “one pointed attention”, as Eknath Eswaran describes in his landmark book, “Meditation”.
Not all my shopping experiences allow me to share my spiritual wisdom. Here I am with Bruce at Ocean State Job Lot having some fun.
Bruce sees beauty everywhere; the seed packet display. It is nice to be out and about with a photographer who “stops to smell the roses”, so to speak.
“Fill your life with adventures not things. Have stories to tell, not things to show.”
Having a dog lets me experience life in a whole different dimension. Is that true for you, too?
Our mini labradoodle, Freddy, is full of energy. I ride on his roller coaster of excitement, wanting affection, eating, sleeping, barking, playing. He has a lot of personality and is demanding of our attention. Rather than look at him as annoying, I choose to see him as a gift from God, someone to remind me to slow down, pay attention, take care of the basics, be nurturing, show love, affection and devotion.
Bruce and I are alike in that we enjoy the social connection with folks when we are about and about, doing errands, volunteering, shopping, taking care of business. It is an opportunity to be kind and helpful to others, share a moment, build good karma.
“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” Helen Keller
I wasn’t always so joyful, uplifted, and positive. I have been racked with depression, had many dark nights of the soul and lonely days, felt that it wasn’t worth it to get out of bed. It seems so long ago, going through each day with a dark cloud over me. After many years of moving through to the light, I see that life is not a struggle for me any longer. It is an adventure.
How did I achieve this transformation? I took to heart the words, “Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.” and “You need to come up higher in consciousness to solve your problems.” It took years of therapy, mind-expanding work, prayer, travel, faith in God, enlightened friendships, spiritual reading, yoga, passage meditation, repeating the mantra, letting go of painful experiences, and the Grace of God to turn to the light, to see the light in myself, in others, in the world.
My wounds, hurts, fears, doubts, etc. were incurable to the extent that I held on to them; they don’t go away on their own. In fact, they continued to accumulate and motivate all my thoughts, choices, and actions until I treated them.
I learned to ‘treat’ through the Mind of Christ, each pain, each hurt, each insecurity by coming up higher in consciousness. A “mind change” is essential if there is ever to be any “life change” at all. This is not a one time deal; our minds need to be tended to with constancy.
“I beseech you brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world, but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye many prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” (Romans 12:1-2)
stories about susan 