When was the last time you learned something new?

“When was the last time you learned something new?” was a question I used to ask candidates interviewing for positions when I was working in Human Resources. It was amazing to me how many people were stumped by this question. It was not my intention to stump anyone; rather, I was seeking out  people who have a zest for learning, are open-minded, can change their minds when presented with new information. The Vice Presidents and CEOs that I supported insisted on these qualities in the people we brought on board.

I  love learning new things and having my mind-set challenged by contrarian views. This week I was so challenged.

 

Prashna asked me if I could  provide transportation to West Springfield High School to one of her 4th grade classmates who is also in the band. The Elementary School band is performing at the West Springfield High School. Prashna is in the school band; she plays the trombone. “Sure, no problem”, I say.

I picked up the young girl at the house that Prashna directs me to. Her Mom comes outside. I get out of the car and introduce myself, assuming that the Mom must be concerned about the person who is driving her daughter to and from the school for the evening performance. I also give the Mom my business card so she knows my name and has my telephone numbers and somehow I think it makes me seem more legit.

She doesn’t give me her telephone number which would be more practical, should some situation emerge regarding her daughter. I don’t even know her last name.

She is Muslim, wearing the traditional dress and head covering. She is petite and quite beautiful. She seems stressed and explains that her husband works many hours and at night. He works at a restaurant. I ask if she has other children. Yes, an infant and a three year old, one of whom has Down’s Syndrome. She takes my hand and we say good-bye.

Zmrda is a lovely 10 year old girl. She is well-spoken and poised. She too wears the traditional head covering of Muslim women.

zmrda

Later, Prashna asked if I can provide transportation for Zmrda, if she gets accepted in the GOTR program.

Girls On The Run is an after-school program for girls that focuses on fitness through educating them and preparing them for a lifetime of self respect and healthy living. The ultimate goal of GOTR  “is to provide the girls with tools and resources that develop their ability to think critically–a skill that will serve them well for a lifetime.”

Prashna gotr

Prashna let me know that Zmrda was accepted into the GOTR program. I contacted the school coordinator and let her know that I would be providing  Zmrda transportation from school to home and asked if the proper clearance was given by the parents so as to avoid any problems when I pick up Zmrda  later in the afternoon.

Ms. O’Brien returned my call and said “yes” the form had stated “Mrs. Susan” [that’s what Prashna and Zmrda call me] as the ‘responsible party’.  Ms. O’Brien wanted to be sure that meant me and she had confirmed it with Zmrda’s Dad by telephone.

I enjoy seeing the girls two afternoons a week. They have become friends and listening to their conversation is always enlivening.

This past Tuesday, I brought Freddy along for the ride as I would not be making any other stops along the way. [On Thursdays, I bring Prashna to Girl Scouts meetings, after we drop off Zrmrda.]  As Prashna is approaching my car, she sees Freddy and Freddy sees her and they both are very excited.

Freddy in the car

As the two girls tumble into the car, Prashna tells Zmrda Freddy’s name and says that he is a good dog and says how much she likes him. She is petting him and Freddy is wagging his tail uncontrollably. Zmrda sits back and says her Mother does not allow her to touch a dog. I ask why and she says “because dogs are dirty and they have germs.”

Uh-oh, did Freddy hear that?

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“Say what?”

Islam forbids Muslims to keep dogs, and the punishment for that is that the one who does that loses one or two qiraats from his hasanaat (good deeds) each day. An exception has been made in the case of keeping dogs for hunting, guarding livestock, and guarding crops.

Most Muslim scholars agree that in Islam the saliva of a dog is ritually impure and that contact with a dog’s saliva requires one to wash seven times. This ruling comes from the hadith:

The Prophet, peace be upon him, said: “If a dog licks the vessel of any one of you, let him throw away whatever was in it and wash it seven times.”

Prashna’s response to the situation was: “Zmrda, pet him and then you can wash your hands and your Mom won’t know what you did.”

Yes, she did say that and I did admonish her for it.

The Nepalis have their own rituals about cleanliness, washing, food and what one can and cannot do with their right and left hands.

I am uncomfortable with beliefs, superstitions, traditions, and rituals that have no basis in what is True. I know I am wandering into dangerous territory here. It just doesn’t sit well with me that parents let their child get into a car with a woman they do not know, yet the same child cannot pet the women’s dog. Which, the stranger woman or the dog, poses the gravest potential danger?

I heard a commentator on television the other day say that “it’s not that Trump doesn’t know anything, it’s that he doesn’t learn anything new and he is not open to learning anything new.”

Religions need to question and revise their man-made interpretations of Truth as new knowledge and insight unfold. Religious dogma cannot remain steeped in the past with all of its cultural backlog and baggage, if it is to be meaningful and relevant to today’s generation.

“Superstition is to religion what astrology is to astronomy, the mad daughter of a wise mother. These daughters have too long dominated the earth.” Voltaire

Jesus, the Nazarene, reminded the Pharisees and the high priests of the day that their religious practices on cleanliness missed the mark when he was asked “Why do your disciples break the traditions of the elders?  They don’t wash their hands before they eat.”

Jesus replied, “And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition?”

Jesus then taught the people, saying “it is not what you touch or put in your body that defiles it; for what you put in your mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body. Rather it is “the emissions of your hearts, your thoughts, words and deeds that cause you to be unclean. But eating with unwashed hands does not make you unclean.” Matthew 15

Petting, touching or kissing a dog does not make you unclean.

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To read about Prashna and my involvement with a Nepali family, read a previous story:

https://storiesaboutsusan.com/2017/09/18/how-did-this-start/

 

 

 

 

 

“what a wonderful life”

Bruce Barone has written a short story about an experience we had on Saturday at Mittineague Park. I am sharing it here with you and hope you enjoy it. I have also included a poem Bruce Barone has recently written about Bridges Together.

mitt park 2017

On Saturday, Susan and I, and Freddy, ran into these two angels at the park down the street from where we live–Mittineague Park.

emma and felcia

They are cousins and they were at the park with their family celebrating their grandfather’s 70th birthday. There were lots of people, adults and children of every age. One man was overseeing the grill and wonderful aromas were wafting throughout the air. And, women were sitting on the picnic tables preparing foods.

The girl on the left was in one of the past 3rd grade classes where we volunteer every Tuesday—reading, talking, laughing, creating art. When she saw us, she ran over and gave us a big hug! That is how wonderful this volunteer program, Bridges Together, is; it benefits both the children and the volunteers.

Freddyat mitt park 2017

She asked if she could introduce her grandfather to us. “Of course”, we said. He came toward us, with a great big smile. He said, with pride, one granddaughter was his daughter’s daughter and the other was his son’s daughter. The large extended family has immigrated to the United States from Moldova.
mitt park fall
Later in the day, I went back to the park and gave the girls and the grandfather each a 4×6 print of this photo—–and they gave me a big plate of food (chicken, beef and lamb kebabs, salad, home-made bread) to take home!

Here is the poem Bruce Barone wrote recently about our volunteer experience.

What A Wonderful World

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This is an account of children, third grade students, of Coburn Elementary School

Located in West Springfield, Massachusetts. Children who are 8-10 years old

Interacting with senior citizens—building bridges together by talking, reading,

Listening, creating art, laughing, sharing pieces of ourselves.

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Many children of refugees and immigrants. Children of dreamers

Of a better way of life. Children of parents and grandparents

From Nepal, Turkey, Iran, Iraq, Syria, Ukraine, Russia, Puerto Rico,

Uzbekistan, Afghanistan, Bhutan, Latvia, Belarus, Germany,

Poland, Kazakhstan, Vietnam, Thailand, Cambodia, Moldova.

Children who speak two, three, four languages.

Children named Maimuna, Luis, Jayden, Ivy, Haydia, Nabaa,

Evan, Luca, Layla, Bogdan, Isabella, Victoria, Mohamed,

Prashna, Prashik, Prateemna, Prabesh, Jaylin, Tisha, Milana,

Emily, Jordan, Miyana, Joseph, Yuliya, Matilda, Lilly, Emil,

Michael, Kimberly, Yariana, Elijah, Hailey, David, Caleb,

Matthew, Emil, Yariana, Mykle, Jade, Mihaela.

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Children who dream of being firefighters, lawyers, baseball players,

Basketball and soccer players, doctors, nurses, scientists, teachers.

Children who say, “You are the best Bridges friends ever.”

“Thank You for listening and talking with me.”

“Thank you for doing the Macarena with me.”

“Thank You for playing cards with me.”

“Thank You for making me laugh.”

prashik and friend

“Thank You for helping me. You were funny, helpful and supportive.”

“Thank You for your company and helping us with our art projects.”

“I am grateful you spent time with us.”

“Thank You for your time. Remember when we made the banks?

That was so much fun! Hope we can do it again.”

“Thank you for being here when I am down. You get me

Up and going. You make me happy.”

“Thank you for helping us with the fun stuff we made.”

“I love you. You will always be in my heart.”

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Our Bridges friends: Children who believe the world is wonderful

“Because Nature is a painting by life;”

“Because there are lots of beautiful things and happy families;”

“Because there are computers, cats, people, food, pets,

Family, friends, water, emogees, sunflowers, rainbows,

Waterfalls, forests, and cookies;”

“Because we have families, food, and trees;”

“Because we see different people every day and they are beautiful;”

“Because of family, friends, cousins, aunts, uncles,

Grandparents and food and drinks;”

“Because of many beautiful faces;”

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“Because everyone loves each other. We all are family;”

“Because of flowers, grass, trees, animals, people, religions;”

“Because of friends and family and my teachers;”

“Because of every person in the world smiling and laughing;”

“Because the roses are red, the clouds white, the sky blue.

They are there for me and you.

What a wonderful world.”

“Mr. Bruce and Miss Susan………

When will we see you again?

I love you.”


super bowl weekend 2017

It’s Super Bowl weekend.

Bruce Barone has bought a half bushel each of avocados and tomatoes to make guacamole and salsa dips.

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avocados

Never mind that I don’t especially like either. There are 4 varieties of chips, too. He grocery shopped on Friday as he “wanted to avoid the crowds on Saturday.”

salsa

He has made hummus for me. I like it served with roasted red peppers and toasted pita. That’s how it was served at Canyon Ranch in the Berkshires when I worked there as Director of Human Resources.

hummus

Stop by Sunday; but you’ll have to leave by 9 p.m because that’s when we go to bed. We’ll find out who won on Monday morning.

Actually, we would rather be in Denver with Bruce’s son, Daryl Barone and his good woman, Julia Mae, watching the game with them and their friends.

daryl-and-julia

But what would we do with our little Freddy and Nadine?

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We used to go to my brothers’ bar, Rallys, in Westfield, MA each Super Bowl Sunday. [They  sold the bar a few years ago.] It was a closed party for their customers who put on quite a spread of food. My mother always made lasagne. The customers always made a big deal of Mare and Joe.  Of course, I continued the tradition when she no longer could. One customer, Kim, made little pineapple cream puffs and would put aside a plateful for us to take home for Joe. It was a good time.

cream-puffs

I am not especially interested in sports and Bruce is not a rabid fan. I am glad for that because I would not like to be married to someone who spent a great deal of time watching sports on television. Surprisingly, to me anyways, Bruce Barone used to play high school football. He was a star athlete and was called “the gazelle” as he ran very fast. Those were his glory days.

brucebarone-football

Sports can do many things, large and small. It can be a unifier, a source of tremendous pride, in a city which has a team. And certainly, it can be a revenue stream for a city, if the powers that be haven’t negotiated away all the monetary benefits.

It’s a shame the cost of tickets. Did you see the woman who asked NFL Commissioner Goodell if he had 2 extra tickets?  http://abc13.com/news/woman-asks-nfl-chief-for-suite-tickets-gets-them/1737209/

“Would you happen to have two extra seats in your suite to watch the game? ” the woman asked NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell during an hour-long fan forum at the House of Blues. “It’d be a little better than my couch, but I just thought I’d throw that out there,” she added.

Goodell responded with a laugh and then, “Are you serious?”  He said to her, “See me afterwards.” He arranged for her 2 tickets in his suite of seats.

Man, that was something! Just like Mare used to say to me, “Susie, you have to speak up and ask for what you want.”

It’s a positive thing for folks to get together and pass the time under convivial circumstances, with friends, family, food, and drink all around. It’s fun, to be sure.

As I said earlier, stop by and have a beer or a glass of wine and some food with Bruce and me. I hope the team you are cheering for wins. If you are betting, the Pats are favored by 3 points. [I put that in because Bruce has no idea what it means.]

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